A letter to the man who knew us and stole from us.

A letter to the man that stole from us., Be Brave, Faith, forgiveness, Learning Curves, Love, Musing..., Photography, Poem, Reboot your life

A letter to the man that knew us and robbed us..
The worst part of the robbery is that we let you in. We let you our lives and in our hearts. We let you in our home and in our family. We gave you our trust. When the trust faltered we gave you unconditional love and a chance to make it right. You tricked us into believing in you because we wanted to. We gave you support and aid and care. Little did we know you took and took and took. The fact that you broke our hearts and trust in the end is emotional and shocking and will heal over time. I have never really experienced this before and it has shook me to my core. To think that you felt entitled to go through my personal space and just take what you wanted from people that you said you cared about is mind boggling to me. I don’t know that I will ever be quite the same.

You stole my peace and my trust in people for a short time but I will get it back because that’s how I am. You stole my Moms wedding ring. She left it in my care. She is in an assisted living dealing with disease. The ring she had on her finger when she married my father. The ring she had on her hand when I was born. Years later when it no longer fit over her arthritic knuckle I would still look at it in the jewelry box with wonder. The ring I would like to pass on to my daughter if I ever get it back.

You stole my high school graduation ring. It was gold with tiny diamonds. No I don’t wear it anymore. Yes, it sat in my jewelry box.. You don’t have a clue what its story is or what it may mean to me. If Iwant to pass it down or if it takes me back to a younger time when I occasionally look at it. That wasn’t enough, you still needed more money. So, you took my first wedding ring to my first husband of my 3 children. Yes, I got a divorce. I have moved on. I no longer wear this ring. But I wore this ring through all the years of raising my children and this ring means something to them because that is the ring I wore when Mommy did everything for them. My daughter is heartbroken she loved that ring. Through the years I got a nice ruby ring and sapphire ring. I even got a solid gold ring with the letters CTR on it which ironically means “choose the right”. You took them too.

Still , I guess we hadn’t helped you enough when we offered you food and to eat with us. We gave you rides to work and someone to talk to when you were sad.

When my grandmother died she left me some money so Since my first wedding ring no longer fit, Knuckles like mom I guess, I put the money toward a white gold ring with a lovely square diamond. I felt this way I wouldn’t just squander the money away and it would mean something. But I guess you figured it didn’t really mean much when you pawned it with the others.

My second marriage to my husband now came along and money was tight at the time. But I sure loved the simple gold ring with a pretty marquise diamond that he put on my finger. That one wasn’t with the others in the Jewelry box so you really must have felt it was ok to take a harder look around. After all, it wasn’t on my finger so it must be yours to take?

I sit and type this letter after visiting the first pawn shop tonight with the police officer and after they took you away in cuffs. In the pawn shop the man poured the rings he had in your name out of an envelope to identify. When I saw my Mom’s wedding ring fall out on the desk it was the weirdest feeling. I started to shake and finally to cry. Along with it was my high school ring and my current wedding rings engagement band. But where is the other half with my diamond? Well they are evidence now. The pawn shop man put them back in the vault and I had to walk away. Apparently I get the great deal of buying them back at the price they gave you for them because law says they are a victim too, or i can wait maybe up to a year as we work it out in court for the charges of felony you are facing. I’ll see you there. At least I will eventually have my mom’s ring again. Tomorrow I will go to two more shops where you apparently took my things. I am crossing my fingers for more special rings there because I learned at one pawn shop a couple of the rings you took in have already been melted down and they are gone. I saw my flute I had been hanging on to from junior high. No biggie, just kinda weird to see it there and know you were in my closet.

Apparently my son’s wake board is at the pawn in your name. He was selling it anyway he really needed the money. I guess you needed it more though. My daughters long board is there too. Just whatever you felt might get you some dough, I guess. To be truthful I don’t know just how much you took. It kinda makes me feel unsafe and strange.

It wasn’t easy to call the police on you it was scary actually and has been quite exhausting. I’m not a good liar like you so I had to avoid you at all costs today so as not to give it away till they got here. They told me to because you might run. I watched as they cuffed you and lowered you into the back seat of the cop car. I guess I better visit all the neighbors today and explain, Now you face a felony and I face you in court.

I want to look in your eyes and ask how you could do this to us? I wanted to ask tonight, how you could do this to someone that was kind to you, that shared their home with you. To people you said you loved that were helping you get through. I sat on the porch waiting for the opportunity to possibly approach you when you were walking out with the officers. I wanted to do it then. I felt that would be good for you. To have to face us in that position to be accountable for what you did. The officer said sitting on the porch watching probably wasn’t appropriate and made us come inside.
I don’t understand that. I think it is completely appropriate for you to be accountable in front of us, to learn every lesson you can. What I don’t think is appropriate is that you were in my home, in my bedroom, in my armoire, my Jewelry box, my bathroom, my spare room and the storage unit behind my house. That you used my ladder to check even the top shelf of my storage unit so you didn’t miss anything that might be good to pawn. Ya, I don’t think that is appropriate. I do think it’s appropriate for you to see us, seeing you, being held accountable for what you did.

 

In my heart I hope you will get help for this and I will work on forgiveness. I will see you in court and no more in my home.

Jenny

door

Be brave my darling…

Be Brave, Photography, Poem

Be brave

On the days when it knocks you down, be kind to yourself.

When you are not your best, when you are not thriving, be loving. 

It will close you up and make you numb or it will make you feel too much.

When you get out of bed and make it to work just barely, be understanding. 

Forget that it was hard.  forget that you had to force yourself, let it go.

When you couldn’t make a decision that once came easy, be kind. 

It will show no mercy. Be patient. 

It will show up when it wants to, and leave just the same.

It doesn’t care about your plans, It doesn’t care about your schedule.

It is here for a while, but not forever. Be brave. 

It will make you cry, but you will get up and dry your tears.

When your creative voice goes silent, let it rest. 

When you want to express your frustration, write your guts out.

When it takes away your taste, spoil yourself.

It will tell you to be alone. Take a breath and call a friend. 

It will exhaust you, take a nap and be kind.

Tomorrow is just around the corner and as quickly as it came,

you will find it gone.

You will thrive and work and create and love and laugh. 

You will be compassionate and strong and fearless and kind.

Be brave my darling…

By Jenny Hanley 2015